Greetings, foul friends!
It’s been a busy month for us, moving a menagerie of distilling equipment, bottles, ingredients, demons, ghosts, and other unspeakable things into the new distillery. As any of you who have moved home will know, it’s not a task you’d wish on your worst enemy while it’s going on, but once you’re in the new place and settled, it’s completely worth it…
Greetings, foul friends!
Can we start this month’s entry with a bit of a moan? Normally, we’d leave that to The Wailing Warblers, the Lodge’s resident band of ghosts, but they’re currently on tour in Europe (speak to your local mausoleum for tickets).
Greetings, foul friends!
May we be the first of the undead to wish you a Happy New Year. We hope you rang in the new year merry, happy, and consuming our award-winning small batch gin.
What did we do for New Year, you ask?…
Greetings, foul friends!
The end of the year fast approacheth. Very soon, people across the land will be encouraging a fat man to break into their homes, eat their food, drink their alcohol, and then leave without so much as a thank you.
Greetings, foul friends!
No sooner have the Halloween embers petered out than we’re lighting new fires to celebrate Guido Fawkes being hung, drawn, and quartered over 400 years ago.
Oh, how we love this quaint little country of yours!
Greetings, foul friends!
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! We realise that you humans usually associate that phrase with Christmas, but we fail to see what could be more wonderful than inclement weather, chilly mornings, dark nights and a higher-than-average chance of being attacked by a werewolf.
Glorious!
Greetings, foul friends!
Can we start this month’s entry with a bit of a moan? Normally, we’d leave that to The Wailing Warblers, the Lodge’s resident band of ghosts, but they’re currently on tour in Europe (speak to your local mausoleum for tickets).
The thing that’s raising our hackles is that the nights are getting noticeably lighter and the days are getting longer. While we’re pleased that this offers you humans the chance to sit out in your gardens and enjoy your favourite flavoured gins, we’re lamenting that the shadows aren’t as long as they were just a few weeks ago.
This gives us creatures of the night fewer places to seek refuge from the sun, and the Lodge’s vampires are especially unhappy about this. They’re moping around the distillery and complaining that, for the next 6 months, they’ll be taking their evening ‘meals’ late because the sun sets later. Believe us when we tell you, there’s nothing more annoying than a bunch of hangry vampires.
It’s going to be a long 6 months.
We feel so morose, now.
Thank you, that’s much better!
What can we offer you in return? How about this…
FESTIVALS
We enjoyed seeing you all at Trentham Gardens last month; so much so, that we’ve decided to go back there this month. If you’re in the vicinity of the ST4 postcode on Saturday the 8th of February, come along to the Trentham Gardens Makers Market between 10 am and 4 pm.
And if that wasn’t enough, we’ll be at the Crewe Hall Hotel & Spa Spring Market the following day between 11 am and 3 pm, so you’ll have plenty of opportunities that weekend to come over, say hello, sample some delicious Black Lodge Potions Gin flavours, and take a bottle or two home with you.
Incidentally, all our flavours make a perfect gift for…
VALENTINE’S DAY
Rather than giving your heart to a loved one this Valentine’s Day (we’ve been told hearts are useful for helping to keep you alive, or something?), why not give them a bottle of our award-winning, handcrafted gin instead?
Available in 5 luscious flavours, your loved one can enjoy a sweet beverage, and you get to live for a bit longer. The flavours are:
🖤 Black Lodge Craft Gin (44% abv)
🖤 Stinging Nettle & Honey Gin (40% abv)
🖤 Wild Strawberry & Black Pepper Gin (40% abv)
🖤 Cherry, Chilli Chocolate Gin (40% abv)
🖤 Smoky Berries & Liquorice Gin (40% abv)
And if you want to hedge your bets even further, there’s the Black Lodge Potion 5-gin gift pack. 5 x 5cl apothecary bottles of each flavour for less than the price of one full bottle.
Sounds like a great deal to us, mortals. Remember:
Roses are red,
Sphynx cats are all skin,
But nothing makes you hiss and purr,
Like Black Lodge Potions gin.
THE BLACK LODGE IS GETTING BIGGER
You remember last month that Igor had a list of things for us to talk about but he was too busy treating Great, Great, Great, Great, Great Cousin Amenhotep’s wounds to give it to us? Well, it turns out the imbecile used the list as part of Amenhotep’s bandages, so it’s lost forever. (Amenhotep is doing just fine, by the way. He’s been reunited with the canopic jars containing his organs and is currently playing boules doubles with Pharaoh Ramesses II and his forefathers in the Underworld). Igor is currently cleaning out the tar pit as penance for his bumblings.
The only thing Igor can remember from the list is that we were to tell you that the Black Lodge will be undergoing some renovations this month to house a new, larger distillery. What does all that mean for you? You’ll have to continue reading these journals to find out!
UNTIL NEXT TIME…
Well, I think that’s enough prattling from us for another month, mortals. Besides, we have to sign off now, as it turns out that The Wailing Warblers are being held by airport security in Amsterdam. The guards are refusing to let them into the country because their passport photos are from when they were alive, and they’ve all rotted a bit since they were taken.
Honestly; not a moment’s peace!
Stay spooky,
Brother G and Brother T
