Greetings, foul friends!
Once again, it’s time to sharpen the feather gifted to us by Poe the Raven and use it to scratch our thoughts in the Black Lodge’s journal. We know that quills are typically made from swan’s feathers, but there haven’t been any swans on the Black Lodge’s grounds since that unfortunate incident when the chef accidentally put hallucinogenic mushrooms in our soup, and we thought the swans were trying to kill us.
But, we digress.
Time to pull up your favourite easy chair, pour a tall glass of your favourite Black Lodge Potion, and relax as we tell you what dates you shouldn’t forget unless you want your loved ones to unleash a flock of murderous swans on you.
Let’s begin.
NOTABLE EVENTS FOR YOUR CALENDAR
There are so many events on your human calendar this month that we thought we’d name the most important ones for you so you don’t forget. Don’t say we never do anything nice for you!
National Absinthe Day (5th)
Our spirit(ual) brother from another mother or sister from another mister, Absinthe, has its own dedicated day this month. Originally created in the 17th century as a cure for illnesses, it’s ironically become the cause of many illnesses the day after it’s been drunk.
Also known as the Green Fairy, the Green Goddess, or the Green Lady, the drink was banned for many years in many countries due to its ‘hallucinogenic’ properties (No, not the swans again!). These days, its strong liquorice flavour, high alcohol content, and relative expense make it a tipple to be enjoyed sparingly, so if you’d like to celebrate the day but would rather be spared the hangover or the night in jail, it’s perfectly acceptable to raise a gin in its place.
International Women’s Day (8th)
The second Friday of the month is a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural, and political achievements of women. The Black Lodge wouldn’t function smoothly without Orla the Banshee keeping us in check, so we’re more than happy to champion women everywhere today.
Mother’s Day (10th)
Speaking of inspirational women in your life, the 10th is Mother’s Day (in the UK, at least). So, whether you’re a Norman Bates-type who likes to keep mother around to stop you from being a dirty bird, Ed Gein, who liked to wear his mother, or you have a more traditional relationship with your mother, show your appreciation for them with a bottle of the Black Lodge’s finest gin.
If it’s your first time ordering with us, you’ll get 5% off, so click here to get your order in time for the 10th and make your Mum/Mom/Mother/Ma beam with delight.
Comic Relief/Red Nose Day (15th)
Comic Relief has raised over £1.5 billion for charity since it launched in 1985. If you want to do your part to raise money by sitting in a bath full of piranhas, shaving a werewolf, or bungee jumping into a nest of vipers, then head here for more details.
St. Patrick’s Day (17th)
St. Patrick’s Day is traditionally celebrated with a pint of Guinness, but have you heard of a Black Velvet? Made with equal parts prosecco and Guinness, the Black Velvet can be further improved by adding a dash of gin. And if you need gin, we know someone who makes excellent gin, so get in touch…
National Cocktail Day (24th)
The 24th is National Cocktail Day, so we thought we’d share one of our favourites with you. Order your gin here to celebrate in style.
Easter Sunday (30th)
Any story that involves crucifixion, rising from the dead, and chocolate is alright with us, so tuck into our delectable Dark Cherry Chilli Chocolate Gin to celebrate Easter the right way.
UNTIL NEXT TIME…
You humans are so…busy! We’re off for a relaxing formaldehyde bath to wind down, so until we see you next time, drink responsibly, stay away from swans, and we’ll see you soon for another Black Lodge Potions journal instalment.
Stay spooky,
Brother G and Brother T
